I also have a story called Those of us in Plaid forthcoming in McSweeney's #33, and a story called The Misery of the Conquistador forthcoming in StoryQuarterly. However, unlike One-Story, there are currently no online excerpts for these stories. And, for contractual reasons, I probably can't put any excerpts up on this blog. So instead I have written an alternate first sentence for each story, both of which are included below:
The Misery of the Conquistador
"Wow, I sure am miserable ... for a conquistador," said he.
Those of us in Plaid
We realized from the very beginning that we were not like all those people who did not wear plaid, but that we were actually very different.
There you have it! No firm release dates for either, but - having tempted you terribly with these alternate first lines - I will make sure to do the decent thing and keep you informed.